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WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 1:10 AM

When you were younger....we're you taught to suppress your tears? Just to hold them in?
I was told never to cry, that crying was "wrong" Everytime I would cry my parents would get mad at me and the situation would just get a whole lot worse...now even though I cry, it feels like the tears never stop...I know I never should've suppressed my tears...but its not my fault,,,coz when your young you listen to what your elders say :(
And I was scared of the situation getting worse...Coz they told me to not cry or else they would get angrier...

Now it's more horrible than ever
It's harder to cope with pain now
What do I do?

Replies to This Posting

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 1:23 AM

    I personally think that's wrong. Parents shouldn't do that to their children. Crying is a healthy and natural release of emotion and in the long run, and I'm talking years later like in their teen years, it could lead to them figuring out other ways to "deal with" pain, like self-harming. Not that that deals with pain but you know what I mean.
    Now if you don't feel comfortable with this, it's fine but do you mind me asking how old you are? Just so I get a better idea and so I can think of things you can do that will be relevant to the age you are. If you don't want to post it here, you can PM me :) xx

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 1:30 AM

    That's awful :( I'm so sorry!

    STOP BULLYING


    cloudnine, Av, ForeverEnchanted13

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 2:16 AM

    Okay, so I would always cry, too, the end.

    But I think your parents are wrong. Parents should know what their children want the best, and one of them is crying. Crying is a part of life, and everybody should know what it feels to cry. So why not cry?

    Crying is a way to let all of your sad feelings out, so if you suppress your tears, you'll probably go crazy and don't know what to do in a difficult situation and panic and stuff. So, let your parents know that you should cry, too. I don't know how, though. I'm not so sure. But knowing parents, they'll (surely) someday let you cry once in a while.:) I mean, they're your parents, right? :)


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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 2:34 AM

    I think crying is good, personally. It lets out emotions, crying helps.



    ^
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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 4:00 AM

    Crying is good. It's how you release your emotion. Honestly, it's hard for me to go a day without crying, for random reasons, and you should know that when you need to cry, CRY.




    ~~~

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 4:07 AM

    crying at certain times is good...it helps us to release whatever goes inside us..and makes a little refresh and we feel better... i cry a lot to make me feel free from some bad situation i am going through and makes me a little happy too!!! its not a bad thing its just a natural process for all of us!
    taylor is the best thing that's ever been mine.....

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 4:30 AM

    OneThingMissing wrote:
    Honestly, it's hard for me to go a day without crying.



    ~~~

    Yup, same!

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 6:16 AM

    My dad used to get annoyed and be like "why are you crying? You're not hurt" and that was frustrating for me, like he didn't understand.

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 4:58 PM

    Clueless wrote:
    My dad used to get annoyed and be like "why are you crying? You're not hurt" and that was frustrating for me, like he didn't understand.


    Aww xox I can relate :)

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 5:00 PM

    ForeverEnchanted13 wrote:
    I personally think that's wrong. Parents shouldn't do that to their children. Crying is a healthy and natural release of emotion and in the long run, and I'm talking years later like in their teen years, it could lead to them figuring out other ways to "deal with" pain, like self-harming. Not that that deals with pain but you know what I mean.
    Now if you don't feel comfortable with this, it's fine but do you mind me asking how old you are? Just so I get a better idea and so I can think of things you can do that will be relevant to the age you are. If you don't want to post it here, you can PM me :) xx


    Aww thank you for your advice :) xox it's really helpful :) xox I agree with you x

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 5:01 PM

    ASMITA wrote:
    crying at certain times is good...it helps us to release whatever goes inside us..and makes a little refresh and we feel better... i cry a lot to make me feel free from some bad situation i am going through and makes me a little happy too!!! its not a bad thing its just a natural process for all of us!
    taylor is the best thing that's ever been mine.....


    Thank you for your advice! :) xox I will try to cry more, to feel better about the situation :) xox I agree with how you say it's a natural process :)

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 5:02 PM

    OneThingMissing wrote:
    Crying is good. It's how you release your emotion. Honestly, it's hard for me to go a day without crying, for random reasons, and you should know that when you need to cry, CRY.



    ~~~


    Thank you :) xo

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 5:02 PM

    Wonderstruck Princess wrote:
    I think crying is good, personally. It lets out emotions, crying helps.



    ^
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    Thank you :) xox

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 5:03 PM

    SwiftiesRuleTheWorld wrote:
    That's awful :( I'm so sorry!

    STOP BULLYING


    cloudnine, Av, ForeverEnchanted13

    Xoxo

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Wed, Dec 12, 2012 at 5:05 PM

    TaylorThirteen wrote:
    Okay, so I would always cry, too, the end.

    But I think your parents are wrong. Parents should know what their children want the best, and one of them is crying. Crying is a part of life, and everybody should know what it feels to cry. So why not cry?

    Crying is a way to let all of your sad feelings out, so if you suppress your tears, you'll probably go crazy and don't know what to do in a difficult situation and panic and stuff. So, let your parents know that you should cry, too. I don't know how, though. I'm not so sure. But knowing parents, they'll (surely) someday let you cry once in a while.:) I mean, they're your parents, right? :)

    Thank you xox I agree with you :)


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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Thu, Dec 13, 2012 at 4:00 AM

    I don't think you can teach someone to do that. I'm 17 and I cry about the smallest silliest things. You either have it in you or you don't. That doesn't mean I'm not strong. I'm one of the strongest people I know, considering what I've been through. Tears sometimes make things better than suppresing your feelings and bottling them up :)

    by me (:

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Tue, Jan 21, 2014 at 3:29 AM

    I'm not sure how this came about, but as a child I was really quiet so I guess I observed people a lot. I realised that people would stare at you when you cried, and to me that was embarrassing. (Why, I don't know) So I taught myself how not to cry in public. Also, my parents taught me that you can't cry unless you're hurt(physically). Then as I grew older I kind of taught myself to fake smiles and all that, so when someone offended me it was like a reflex, I'd just fake laughter or a smile. I guess like around last year, I'd cry openly when my parents scolded me, so they were kind of annoyed, like you're the one in the wrong, you have no right to cry. I started to suppress emotions and that led to some problems, for example, I would keep falling sick because I kept everything inside. Things are better now, thank goodness.

    My advice to you is learn from my experience. If your parents tell you to suppress your tears, explain to them politely about how you feel, and maybe they'll understand. If you have any problems, don't be afraid to PM me! I don't bite :)

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Tue, Jan 21, 2014 at 2:18 PM

    I wasn't really directly taught about what to do if I felt like crying. But since pre-school, every time somebody did cry all the other kids would point and call them a crybaby, so that indirectly taught me to fight them back.

    ^Avatar and siggy made by Tris

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Tue, Jan 21, 2014 at 3:07 PM

    Like silencequitethisloud posted, I wasn't really directly told or taught about what to do if I felt like crying, either...I wasn't really ever told not to, either, and I haven't really had any incidents in my life where I cried in front of people and they made fun of me...I do cry often though (mostly when I'm by myself). I actually cry easily as well (I really wish I didn't) - I remember myself in gym class or on the playground in elementary and middle school crying almost right away if I got hit in the face (hard) with a ball - it was just like it was automatic. I really wish I didn't cry so often and automatically when things like these happen, but I can't help it...I just feel stupid when I cry in front of other people...

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    Re: WERE YOU TAUGHT TO SUPPRESS YOUR TEARS?

    Tue, Jan 21, 2014 at 3:20 PM

    Initially I was. When I was a child, I had strict Asian parents. In fact, some things that resound so loudly in my memory are my dad telling me not to cry and that I was not allowed to cry. When I say strict Asian parenting, I mean the kind that beats you (for your own good, sure, but beating nonetheless).

    Then my parents underwent a huge change and we all learnt that it was actually alright to cry and to express emotions in an appropriate way. We're all still learning (even though they are way past 50 years of age), but better late than never and I'm glad it happened when I was still of a young age. Our family has grown a long way these past 5-6 years.



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